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 HE
ROLES OF men and women are complementary but necessarily
different. Although men and women often do the same things,
and even at the same time, they tend to function from
different instincts and inspirations.
 Groups
in secular society generally concede (lately, at least) that
the two sexes do not respond to life in all the same ways.
They spend considerable time discussing, researching, and
analysing male and female attitudes and behaviour.
The
Church favours another approach. She holds up models for us
to emulate -- noble women and men who have exhibited holy,
zealous, powerful, and joyful lives -- and ask us to live by
their example and principles.
Every
man (like every woman) is unique, although still made in the
image of God. Because each person has a unique personality,
trying to develop a collective psychology for men is
inappropriate. Such insights are of limited help in
Christian ministry. Instead, the Church offers the apostles
as the preeminent male models of Christ. The apostles'
experience with Jesus reveals a considerable amount about
male Christianity.
Nothing
shamed the apostles more than their cowardly flight, just as
Jesus was arrested. Tradition has it that St. Peter wept
every day of his life for his denial of our Lord, until
lines worked their way into his cheeks.
On
the other hand, Jesus fearlessly defended the apostles in
the moment of ultimate danger. He told the soldiers sent to
arrest him, "If I am the one you are
looking for, let these others go."[1]
In contrast to their cowardice, our blessed Saviour remained
courageous all the way to the cross, although he faced the
cruelest death any person has ever undergone. Even in his
divinity, he was crushed to death by our sins.
What is the matter with you guys?
Women
often misunderstand the lack of courage in men. The most
insecure woman will normally carry out whatever is necessary
for her extended family, ignoring any risks or discomfort to
herself. Married women eventually realize that they often
have to encourage their husbands, when they balk at
difficult situations, perhaps even give them a "gentle"
shove.
As
precious as their help is to men, women can only do so much
for them. The natural courage that women provide is not
enough for a supernatural mission. Men must open themselves
to courage from God, boldly accepting each day's trials as
they come. As men live supernatural courage, women receive
great courage from them.
What authority have
you for acting like this?[2]
In
the evening of his resurrection, the first Easter Sunday,
Jesus breathed on the apostles and commissioned them to
preach the Good News to make disciples of all nations,
baptising them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the
Holy Spirit.[3] After fifty days
of extraordinary formation, the Lord sent the Holy Spirit to
empower them for this work. With amazing courage, the
apostles preached to the crowds in Jerusalem, and three
thousand were converted that very day. The male apostolate
is to establish the Church. The Church needs to be
established in every age, as the growing, expanding, and
maturing Body of Christ.
Laymen
may protest that we cannot use apostles as models. Bishops,
after all, are the direct successors of the apostles and
represent the person of Christ in the local Church. However,
every person is joined to the bishop and his mission through
Baptism. Vatican Council II made a solemn point about the
laity's role in the Church: "From the fact of their union
with Christ the head, flows the layman's right and duty to
be apostles. Inserted as they are in the Mystical Body of
Christ by baptism and strengthened by the power of the Holy
Spirit in confirmation, it is by the Lord himself that they
are assigned to the apostolate."[4]
The Council Fathers are very clear. We are all apostles,
with the same commission as 'the Twelve'.
A true model
St.
Paul understood that he was a model for the Churches he
founded. He offered himself as one of those holy examples.
This is why I urge you to take me as
your pattern and why I have sent you Timothy, a dear and
faithful son to me in the Lord, who will remind you of my
principles of conduct in Christ, as I teach them everywhere
in every church.[5] He
reminded his disciples that they must also model Christ for
their flocks. He instructed Timothy,
...be an example to all the believers
in the way you speak and behave, and in your love, your
faith and your purity.[6]
Paul reminded Timothy (who obviously needed some
exhortation) that he must have courage to lead Christ's
people, ...so that...you may fight
like a good soldier with faith and a good conscience for
your weapons.[7]
Some
disciples showed a terrible lack of courage and failed their
vocation. We often forget that these men also were ordinary,
not certifiable psychopaths. Paul told Timothy that Demas
had deserted him for love of this
life.[8] We have no way of
telling whether Demas abandoned his ministry or left the
Christian faith entirely. His Christian courage failed in
the face of unknown temptations.
The
notorious example of Judas Iscariot also confronts us. We
know that God desires everyone's salvation,[9]
but Judas refused to accept it. Judas had already made
himself Satan's agent; he was a thief;
he was in charge of the common fund and used to help himself
to the contents.[10]
Perhaps Judas' heart already belonged to Satan when our Lord
chose him. Judas' betrayal of Jesus fulfilled the scriptures
[11] but his own sinful decisions
made him available for that rôle; we become either a
slave of Christ or a slave of the devil.
The steady walk
All
these models, both positive and negative, demonstrate the
particular kind of courage men need to follow after Jesus.
Men must each day decide to live God's word to them reliably
and without compromise. St. Peter earned a terrible rebuke
from Jesus for tempting the Lord away from the suffering he
had to undergo.[12] Twenty more
years of holy ministry as the Church's first pope did not
prevent Peter from receiving another stinging correction
from Paul:
However,
when Cephas came to Antioch, then I did oppose him to his
face since he was manifestly in the wrong. Before certain
people from James came, he used to eat with gentiles; but as
soon as these came, he backed out and kept apart from them,
out of fear of the circumcised.... I said to Cephas in front
of all of them. Since you, though you are a Jew, live like
the gentiles and not like the Jews, how can you compel the
gentiles to live like the Jews?[13]
For
St. Peter to have compromised on such a fundamental question
would have set the Church back for decades, and caused much
confusion and division. His mission was to establish the
Church and make it secure. Peter's infallibility in faith
and morals did not extend to establishing good order. He
needed the courage of his convictions.
The
work of establishing the Church begins with a man's
immediate family. Jesus also calls a man forward to the
whole family of God, and the whole family of man. Peter was
able to say to Jesus, "Look, we have
left everything and followed you."... Jesus said to them,
"In truth I tell you, ...everyone who has left houses,
brothers, sisters, father, mother, children or land for the
sake of my name will receive a hundred times as much, and
also inherit eternal life."[14]
A man's embracing the Lord's call to establish God's kingdom
in his family leads to a wonderful compatibility in
Christian marriage, and the husband becomes a source of
grace for his wife's share of the Church's mission.
God
calls men to work as slaves of Christ
who wholeheartedly do the will of God, [15]
each day putting our flesh to death on the cross in order to
obey him. This leads us to experience the power of Jesus
within us.
The
apostles were far from perfect, but their love of God and
desire for his will drove them on, forming them into true
shepherds -- men who loved God's people without reserve.
Inspired by the holy courage these godly men have modelled,
let us embrace the cross without hesitation, that our Lord
Jesus might use us to establish his kingdom and fill us with
joy: ...as you share in the sufferings
of Christ, be glad, so that you may enjoy a much greater
gladness when his glory is revealed,[16]
each man joining in his master's
happiness.[17]
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